Funny Sms

Funny Sms, Funny Text Messages, Damn Funny Sayings, Jokes, Funny Hindi Sms

Funny Sms, Funny Text Messages, Damn Funny Sayings, Jokes, Funny Hindi Sms

Wanna send funny jokes, text messages, funny sms to your friends to make them laugh a lot, then choose a funny sms message from the vast collection of sms2night funny sms jokes and messages, and send to your friends now.

Funny hindi jokes

Sir - Baccho kasam khao kabhi sarab, cigarate, jua or ladki ko nehi chuoge.Des k liye jaan doge..
Bacche - de denge sir, aysi zindegi rakh k kya karenge.

A funny love letter of biscuit wala

Biscuit wala"s love letter - Dear MARRIE, wish u a GOOD DAY,U have just KRACKJACKED my LITTLE HEARTS,now i am in 50-50 position,plz dont play HIDE N SEEK with me,ur TIGER.

Funny Bengali Jokes

Question - jatak golper Buddhadeb ses jibone ki hoye jonmechilen?
Answer - Paschim banger cheif minister.

Funny sms jokes about vodafone

 A lady delivered twins,surprisingly 1 s a boy and another 1 is a dog. how is it possible? Bcoz her husband is a VODAFONE dealer,whereever u go,network follows.

Funny text messages

A man saw his wife sleeping wd his friend.
He took a gun and shot him.
Wife says in anger "is tarha behave karoge to sare dost kho doge."

Funny text message - saand amd gai

Saand - " kya bolti tu?"
Gai - "kya main bolu?"Saand "sun''
Gai - " suna"
Saand - "aati kya goshala?"
Gai - "kya karu aake main goshala?"
Saand - "mundi hilayenge,ghas chabayenge,gobar felayenge aur kya".

Love never die - a funny mssg

2 lovers plans 2 suicide.
Boy - jumped 1st,
Girl closed her eyes and return back saying love is blind
Boy in air opened his parachute saying love never die.

Funny sms message

Wife 2 husband - oh zara dhire se karo rajdhani chala rahe ho kya?Maalgadi chalao na.
Their son fell from bed and said - jo marji chalaopadh passenger ko maat girao.

Cat and Elephant - A Funny message

Cat - how old r u?
Elephant - 15 years
Cat - 15 ? but u look so big
Elephant - i am a complan boy
Cat - i am 30
Elephant - 30? but u look so small.
Cat - i am ponds age miracle.

Funny jokes

On a romantic day sardar's girl friend asks him,Darling on our engagement day,will u give me a ring?
Sardar - sure but from landline or mobile?

Hot and funny sms

Mallika searwat ne Ramdev se pucchi ki -
"main nahate samay kaya kagaun ki meri yovan surakshit rahe?
Ram dev ne kaha - "Bathroom ka darwaja".

Funny sms messages

Santa - kitne bacche hai aapke?
Banta - 13.
Santa - baapre itne bacche kyun?
Banta - gharwali k baap se waada kiya tha ki kabbhi usko khali pet nehi rakhunga.

Funny sms jokes

Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!

Funny messages

you know ek ladki aapni life mein RANI LAXMI BAI hoti hai kaise?
shadi se pahle rani
shadi k baad laxmi
aur 2-3 bacche hone k baad bai.

Funny sms jokes

A Girl Checks Her Weight = 58kg.
Removed Sandals = 56.
Then Dupatta = 52
Now Coins Finished.......
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A Boy Behind Her
Said
"U Carry On",
I Have Coins!

Romance Mathematics - Funny message

~ Romance Mathematics ~

Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair
Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy

What a joke

I have lots of jokes in my inbox,
But I can't send you all of them,
It will take a lot of time,
So I'm sending you just 1 joke
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"You are so beautiful"

Decent Funny Sms

Wife :-I will die.
Husband :- I will also die.
Wife :- why will you die?
Husband :- because I can't bear that much happiness

Decent Funny Joke

God made us body parts for a reason. Eyes: to look at you Hands: to pray for you Mind: to remember you Heart: to miss you and.. Legs: to kick you if u ever forget me!!

Funny sms about Father's Age

Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me,
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born?

Damn Funny sms jokes in hindi

A boy went 2 drop an unknown aunty 2 her home,
Aunty: beta raat bahot ho gayi hain, yahi so jao, bittoo ke room me.
Boy: nahi aunty main guest room me so jaunga
next morning a beautiful girl comes with a cup of coffee.
boy: aap kon?
girl: main bitoo.., aap kon?
boy: main chutia...

A funny t-shirt slogan

Slogan written on a bald man's T-shirt...
God made some perfect heads..
on d rest he put hair to hide his mistakes..

A funny puzzle sms

1- U r a nice person.
2- line one is true.
3- line 2 is false if line 1 is true.
4- both 2&3 are true.
5- all 4 r false.
Cant solve it??? pass on

A funny mathematics jokes sms

I.Q. Test:
Char zero ek saat likho
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Likha?
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kaise?
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0000 aise likha?
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Fail...
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Correct Ans "4017"
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Ghar walo ne kitni umido se padhaya,
sab pani mein...

Funny sms about Dentist

If dentists make films,wt the names will be-
*Daant ho na ho
*Jaanam brush karo
*Aa ab clean karen
*Kabhi teeth kabhi gum
*Humara daant aapke paas hai!:-)

Tell about yourself - A Funny Sms

Those beautiful eyes, that incredible body, such a brain, a sexy mouth, nice smile .... but that is enough about me, tell me how you are?

Funny sms - teacher and student

TCHR : TUM BADE HOKR KYA KROGE?
BOY : SHADI
TCHR : NHI, MERA MTLB KYA BNOGE?
BOY : DULHA,
TCHR : OHO, I MEAN KYA HASIL KRNA CHAHTE HO?
BOY : DULHAN

Post Graduate - Funny Jokes

If someone passed any degree after graduation its called Post Graduate,
if some passed a degree after masters, what it would be called?
Simple.......
Post Master

Funny jokes - Teacher vs student

TEACHER: WO TEEN WORDS BTAO JO SBSE JYADA BOLE JAATE HAI?
STUDENT:MUJHE NAHI PTA
TEACHER:SABASH BETA BAITH JAO.

Employee and boss - a funny conversation

EMPLOYEE- "BOSS MERI SHADI HO GAYI, MERI SALARY BADHA DO"
BOSS- "FACTORY KE BAHAR HONE WALE HADSO KE LIYE COMPANY ZIMEDAR NAHI HOTI"

Spaces between fingers - A Funny Jokes

Do you know why God has created spaces between your fingers?
So that someone would come in your life..
hold your hand & say...
"LE BIDI PEE.."

One Day One Fool - A Funny Message

2day i have not sent Sms 2 anybody Except U.
2day i have not thought about anybody Except U.
Because my policy is?
one day one fool..!

A funny sms - Price of Banana peel

Cstmer : How much is that banana for?
Slsman : Rs.10
Cstmer : Can you sell it to me for Rs.6?
Slsman : At that rate, you will only get the banana peel!
Cstmer : Ok I will buy the banana for Rs.4, but you can keep the peel!

Kamina Master ji

School mein master ji ne puchha - " Mujh me koi bhi kami nahi hain"
To mujhe tum log kya kahoge?
Students : "Kami na"

Hindi funny sms

One day Raja and rani decided to send messages to each other by using
Pigeon instead of mobile. The very next day pigeon reached raja without any
message. He angried and called to rani. She told stupid "This was a missed call"

If a boy gives a love letter - funny jokes

If a boy gives a love letter to a gurl, pple call him "Loffer"
But if a gurl gives a letter to a boy, they call it "Offer".
Feeeeel da diffffference :)

A Funny Jokes

Sahab:
Tum bathroom main qun ghus aye,
kiya tumhein pta nahi tha ki main nahaa rahaa hun?
naukar:
sahab galati ho gayi,
mein samjhaa tha begum sahibaa naha rahi hain ;-)

A damm funny conversation

Husband: Meri Biwi Gum ho Gae Hay!
Post Master: Andhay ye post office hay
Police Station jao.
Husband: Maaf Kejeay Ga Khushi
may Smjh nai a Rha Kidhar jaaon?

A funny sms poetry

Jack & Jill went up da hill 2 have a little fun.
But stupid Jill forgot da pill and now they have a son.

Son and mom - A funny sms message

son : aap papa k upar char k jump kyon karte h?
mom : papa k pet ki hawa nikal ne k liye.
son : kya faida, kamwali to papa ki pant khol k mukh se fir bhardeti hai.

Funny sms jokes - Dhitarastra and Gandhari

Dhitarastra - main bahut khush hoon priye, tumne mujhe 100 putra diye.
Gandhari - yeh samvab na hota swami aagar aap andhe na hote.

Funny sms jokes - Dhitarastra and Gandhari

Say who is guilty
Wife dreaming in the midnight & suddenly shouts "Quick my husband is back."
Man gets up, jumps out of the window n realises damn, I am the husband ;)

Govt Holidays - Funny Jokes

Teacher : What is common between Buddha, Jesus, Mahabir and Guru Nanaka?
Student : All of them were born on government holidays.

Funny Shayari

Kashti toofan se nikal sakti hai,
Taqdeer kisi bhi waqt bhi badal sakti hai,
Hausla rakh, channel na badal,
SANIA MIRZA kisi bhi waqt Jhuk sakti hai

Funny sms - doctor and patient

Doctor : kya taklif hai?
Patient : sote waqt saas lene mein taklif hota hai
Doctor : aj se sote waqt saas ko nehi saali ko lekar sona

Mallika Sherawat goes to the L.I.C

Mallika Sherawat goes to the L.I.C officer to insure her body,
the L.I.C officer refused,
sorry madam we dont cover public property

Ek pagal or aadmi.. funny jokes

Ek pagal ulta nanga soya tha,
ek admi ne uske piche tabla bajaya
ulta soya huya pagal sidha huya aur bola,
le ab bansuri baaja.

Crazy mom - funny text

Son : Mom u r white but why i am black?
Mom : ok dear considering all the crazy things i've done at young age,
i am really thankful to god that u dont bark.

Highest level of stupidity

What is the highest level of stupidity?
Ans:- Jab kansmama ko pata tha ki devki aur Vasudev ki 8wa santan uska badh karega
to dono ko karagar me eksaath kyun rakha?.....

Funny conversation between a boy and a girl

Boy - if I kiss u and run, what will u think?
Girl - I'll think.......ek bewakoof,
jo pura paper attempt kaar sakta tha
woh sirf objectives likhke bhag gaya.

90 year old man and doctor

90yr man: My 18yr wife is pregnant, ur opinion doc?
Dr: Let me tel u a story. A hunter in a hurry, grabs n umbrela instead of d gun. He moves into d jungle, sees a lion, lifts d umbrela, pulls d handle n BANG, De lion drops dead!
Old man: Dat is impossible, sum1 else must hav shot d lion!
Dr: EXACTLY!!

I love your daughter

A boy: I love ur daughter since 5 months.
Girls Father: How can u proove it.
boy: wait for 4 month... u will belive ur self.

I love your daughter

Ek aisi jagah btao jaha amir se amir insaan bhi katori lekr khada rahta hain
socho

socho

socho

aur socho

sochte raho

Golgappe(panipuri) wale ke pas :D

Teacher and student

Teacher : U failure !
At ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir,
but at ur age hitler commited suicide

Funny jokes about Sania Mirza

Sania Mirza started playing at the age of 6.. After that..
Everything in her life changed..
Except the SIZE of her skirt...!!

Koun si devi ki prasad famous - funny jokes

Kaun si devi aise hai jiska prasad bhut famous hai
socho?
Dimag lagao....
Are yaar,
Rabry Devi ke
Lalu Prasad.

A Funny Jokes

BOY- bus train aur ladki ek aati hai to dusri jati hai.
GIRL- auto riksha or ladka ek bulao to char chale aate hain.

Ladki ke badle Maa

Dad: BETA ladki ka baap ghadi de to SUIT mang lena!
Scooter de to CAR, Dukan de to MAKAN manglena.
Beta- acha to LADKI ke badle
uski
MAA manglu?

Two gay friends

What will Two Gay Men Tell Each Other When They See A Very Beautiful & Pretty Girl...?
..
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YAAR, LADKI AISI HAI TO "ISKA BHAI KAISA HOGA"

Happy smile day

Bandriya ne apni maa se pucha meri sadhi kiske sath hogi,
Bandriya ki maa ne kha agar ye sms padne wala muskra de to
Samjo baat pakki.
Happy smile day

Funny question and answer about shaadi

Ques : shadi me dulhe ke saath Baarati kyun jate hain ? ? ? Ans :- kyunki bade kehte hain ki kisiki khushi mein Jao na jao par musibat me zarur jana chahiye..

Funny messages

A notice in a factory for girl workers.
If your skirt is long, protect yourself from machines at work.. If it is short, protect yourself from men at work

Funny sms jokes

What happend 2 ur mobile? i was trying 2 call u but i got this msg: welcome 2 D jungle network, D monkey u r tring 2 call is on tree plz try later.

Funny messages

Last night I lay in my bed looking at the beautiful stars, the moon and the sky...then i thought where the fuck is my roof

Funny sms jokes

Jesus says to John come forth ill give you eternal life. John came fifth he won a toaster..

Funny messages

This cat is cat a cat good cat way cat to cat keep cat a cat idiot cat busy cat for cat 20 cat seconds cat!
NOW READ IT WITHOUT SAYIN CAT!

Funny sms jokes

Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information Fighting Everytime!
WIFE satys No, it means -
With Idiot for Ever.

Funny messages

Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

Funny sms jokes

Love affairs:Something like cricket,
where one-day internationals are more popular than a five-day test.

Funny messages

Boy : while filling up a form: "Dad, what should I write for mother tongue?"
Dad : Very long!

Funny sms jokes

A sardarji Doctor falls in Love with a Nurse.
He writes a love letter to the Nurse :- I Love U sister....

Funny messages

Santa was riding on a horse. He jumped the red light & a cop whistles.
Santa lifts the tail of horse & says: 'ok come and note the number' :)

Funny sms jokes

Andhe ke hath me "TORCH",
Bahre ke hath me "RADIO",
Gunge ke hath me "MIKE",
AUR AAP KE HATH ME "MOBILE"
WAH WAH Kya Zamana Aaya hai!!!

Funny messages

HAR KHUSI KO TERI TARAF MOD DENGE, TERE LIYE CHAND TARE TOR DENGE, TERE LIYE KHUSIYON KE DARVAAZE KHOL DENGE, 1 BAAR HAS KE TO DIKHO TERE SAARE DAANT TOR DENGE HA..HA..HA

An urdu funny sms

A 60 year old bachelor advertizes his zaroorat-e-rishta in newspaper. After a month, he gets a letter saying, "Miyan! Is umar mein farishtey aatey hain, rishtey nahin."

Funny messages

Rabri : oji sunte ho raat me billi(cat) pura dudhwa p jati hai. Lalu : tereko kyee bar bole hain ki raat me blaujwa ka button lga kr soya kar.

Funny sms jokes

After an emotional hug, Girl whispers to Boy:
"If you hug me once more like that, I will be yours forever"
Boy: Thanks for the warning!!!

Funny messages

Sexy Teacher: Main kisi per bhi aik nazar dal kay bata sakti hoon
kay woh meray baray main kia soch raha hai.
Student: Miss jab ap ko pata chal jata hoga to bari sharmindagi hoti hogi na!!

Funny sms jokes

Cast of a new Hindi movie:
Ayesha Takia
Mallika Sherawat
Rakhi Sawant
Sherlyn chopra
Bipasha basu
Sameera Reddy
Name of the movie:
ALL THE BREAST

Funny messages

Sarah ka Boyfriend usay milne aaya
Tu Sarah k chote bhai ne door Khola aur masumyat se bola
Aap roz roz Baji se milne aa jatey hein
Kya aapki Apni Behen Nahi ha?

Funny sms jokes

Ek bar karo na plz
Kisi ko pata nahi chalega
Plz karo naaa
Muje acha lage ga
Ek bar hamari dosti ki khatr
Kar do na plz
Ek pyara sa SMS..

Funny messages

In a bath room, a boy touchez a girl every where
Yu Know who was dat boy?
Stupid Itz Life boy Soap
Dirty pple alwayz think dirty.

Funny sms for friends

apko 1 word bhejta hu
jise ap aage se padhoya pichhe se
aapko apna hi naam dikhai dega
ULLU

Funny kids

Boy and girl of class 2 asked teacher: "can kids of our age have kids?" Teacher replied "NO Never!!" Boy said to girl : "see i told you not to worry!!!!".

A funny sms about wedding ring

Girl:It’s 2 tight
Boy:Don’t worry,I’ll do it slowly,
Gal:Push it in,
Boy:Ah..I can’t,
Gal:It’s painful,
Boy:Forget it.
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We’ll buy new WEDDING RING!

Funny messages

 A beautiful girl goes to Professor cabin
and
say
that i will do anything to pass in the exams
and professor says "OK THEN
OPEN YOUR
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Books And Study"

Funny sms jokes

He came at night,
explored my body,
got on top of me,
touched me, he bit,
sucked, swalowd,
when he was satisfyed,
he left, i was hurt,
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BLOODY… MOSQUITO !!!!

Funny messages

3 FEELINGS
what is the diference between stress, tension & panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,
tension is when girlfriend is pregnant &
panic is when both r pregnant

I thought It was MONEY

A young girl after her honeymoon
came fully exhausted and tired,

When her friends asked her what happened?

She replied :
When this 70 year old bastard told me
he has saved a lot from last 50 years,
"I thought It was MONEY"

Funny messages

A short thing
its get longer as u hold it
& pass between woman's breast
& enters into a small hole
What is it?



Ans. cars seat belt... u dirty mind!

World's smallest resignation letter

World's smallest resignation letter?

Respected sir,

I love Ur wife.

Thank you

Funny messages

GIRL:My heart is like a mobile
and you are the sim card

BOY:I m very happy. . .
Gal:dont b too happy. . .
If I get a new offer
I will change the sim card..!

Funny sms jokes

Husband wanted to call the hospital
to ask about his pregnant wife,
but accidently called the cricket stadium.

He asks, "How's the situation?"

He was shocked & nearly died on hearing the reply.

They said, "It's fine. 3 are out,
hope to get another 7 out by lunch,
last one was a duck!".. :P

Funny messages

Difference between Friend & Wife

U can Tell ur Friend
"U r my Best Friend"
But

Do u have courage tell to ur Wife
"U r my Best Wife?"

Funny jokes

READ THIS SCARY STORY IF YOU DARE.
On a rainy day,
an old man was standing with a book for sale.
A young man came to buy.
He bought the book for Rs.3000.
 

Old man advised
"DONT OPEN LAST PAGE OF THE BOOK othrwise YOU’ll face problem"
Man finished the book with great fear but didnt open the last page.
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But,after a week,
Out of curiousity he opend the last page and..

he almost fainted to see..
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Retail Price: Rs 30/-

Funny messages

Sometimes wen i cry no 1 c my tears,
wen i m woried no 1 c my pain,
wen i m happy no 1 c my smile
lekin…
sala. 1 ladki k saath ghoomay
to sab dekh lete hai..

Importance of thumb

Importance of thumb...

Children use it 4 chewing

Illiterate people use it 4 sign

Winners 4 victory

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AND
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My FANS use it 4 reading my messages
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Oh...u toooo?

Funny messages

Girl: if u will try 2 kiss me, main shore macha dungi.
Boy: Lekin yahan to dur tak koi nahi hai.
Girl: I know but formality to poori karni hi padegi..

Funny sms jokes

Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!

Funny messages

A : u r Active
B : u r Best
C : u r Cute
D : u r my Dearest
E : u r Excelant
F : u r alwayz First
G : u r Great
Sorry cant lie till Z…

Funny sms jokes

Boy friend is fun,
&
Husband is gun,

Boy friend is light of moon,
&
Husband is month of june,

Boy friend is tooty fruity,
&
Husband is qismat phooti.

Funny messages

Two devils came in 2 my dreams.
They said,
"We want 2 disturb some good person."
I suggest them your name.
They said,
"We cannot disturb our boss."

Funny sms jokes

God has given many qualities to you,
Good look, personality, charm, intelligence,
And many more……this is call as
"Allah meherbaan to gadha bhi pehalwan.."

Funny messages

Teacher : Correct the sentence,
"A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"

Student : "A cow and a bull is grazing in the field"
Teacher : How? Student : Ladies first.

Bank Robbers - Funny jokes

After robbing d Bank, robber 2 clerk: Did u see me robbing?
Clerk: Yes.
Robber shot him dead & asked d next clerk: Did u?
2nd clerk: No, But my wife saw u!

Teacher and pappu - Funny sms

teacher:agar chor piche ke darwaje se aaye then what to do??
pappu: just dial 001...police bhi peche se ayegi.

Pappu in bus - Funny sms

pappu double deckar bus me upar jakar betha
jese hi bus chali wo bhagkar niche aa gaya
condcr:niche q aaye?
pappu: oye, upar driver nhi he

A funny hindi sms

mehrbaan kadardaan dekho mere sms ka kamaal
ghanti bajegi bander nachega
mobile uthayega sms padega ab muskurayega
ab banda hoshiyari dikhayega or msg forward karega

Wife and Husband - Funny Jokes

Husband: Kal mere khawab main ek larki aye thi. Wah! Kia Larki thee!

Wife: Akeli ayee hogi?

Husband: Tum ko kese pata?

Wife: Uska Husband mere khawab main aya tha!

Funny sms jokes about Brain Transplantaion

If i need "Brain Transplantation" I will prefer your brain...don't think that you are a genius.......... i need a brain which is never used before

Surprise to day - Funny text messages

Son - I want a baby brother.
Mom - your dad is overseas. When he comes back we will talk over it.
Son - why don't u give him a surprise?

Funny sms

A newly married girl name Ruby got first class in her B.Ed exams.
Her husband sent telegram to her parents -
Ruby First Class in Bed!

9 Confusions

"Interesting Confusions"

1. Can u cry under water?

2. Do fish ever get thirsty?

3. Why don't birds fall out of trees when they sleep?

4. What do u call a male lady bird?

5. Why is it called building when it's already built?

6. When they say dog food is new & improved in taste, who tastes it?

7. If money doesn't grow on trees then why banks have branches?

8. Why does a round pizza come in sqaure box?

9.Why doesn't glue, stick to its bottle;-)..!!

ECG when you go out

ECG if u go out with wife
/l__,-.__/\_,_,-.

ECG if u go out with girlfriend
_/l_/l_/l_/l_/\_/\_

ECG if wife catches u with girlfriend...
/\________

Man on right & women on left

Q: Do u knw y in a couple's photo
man is on d right side & woman on d left?
A: Coz as per balance sheet, Liabilities r on d
Left Side & Assets on d Right!

Common in Police and Girlfriend

Girlfriend & Police
Main Kia Baat Common Hay ???
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socho !
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socho !
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Aur Socho !
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Donoo Hi Paisa Kha Kar
Chhod Dete Hain ! :p

An elephant and three ants - a funny joke

Three ants find an elephant asleep.
One says,"We'll kill him!"
Other one says,"We'll break his legs!"
3rd one says:
"choro yaar bechara akela hai aur hum teen..!!":-)

Girlfriend in the language of Math

What is a girl friend?

Addition of problems,
subtraction of money,
multiplication of enemies
&
division of friends.

Funny sms messages

A girl & boy were sitting alone,
that boy started touching de girl,

Girl : dont touch me, all this only after marriage.

Boy : ok call me when u r married.

Funny sms jokes

Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE:-

C-Come,
O-On,
L-Lets,
L-Love,
E-Each,
G-Girl,
E-Equally.....
Thats why boys go to college

Monkey and Donkey

What is the difference between Monkey & Donkey ?
Monkey saves this message &
Donkey deletes this message.
Choice is yours

Dinosaurs and Decent Girls

Do u know similarity
between Dinosaurs and Decent Girls?
?
?
?
?
Both don't exist in todays world

Hindi Funny Shayari

Dil ka dard dil torrne waley kiya jaaney,
Pyar ke riwajon ko zamana kiya jaaney,

Hoti hai kitni takleef larrki ko pataney main,
Ye ghar pe baitha larki ka baap kiya jaaney

Funny hindi poem

Mere dost tanhai me na waqt bitaya karo,
Kabhi kabhi mehfilon me bhi aaya karo,

Kiya hua jo toot gaye hen samney k 4 dant,
Phir bhi moun khol ker muskuraya karo..

One hundred percent

Patient : What are the chances
of my recovering doctor?

Doctor : One hundred percent.
Medical records show that
nine out of ten people die of the disease you have.
Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died.

Sun of Moon

Teacher : Which is more important to us,
the sun or the moon?
Pupil : The moon.

Teacher : Why?
Pupil : The moon gives us light at night
when we need it but the sun gives us light
only in the day time when we dont need it.

A funny coversation

beta-5 rupey de do
papa-kya karega
beta-mere sare frnds ka account hai mai bhi khulwaunga
papa-very good. kaha pe?
beta-cigratte ki dukan pe

A man on his death time

one kanjus on his death time
my wife where r u
wife= yes i'm here
kanjus-my sons r u all here
yess papa
to fir us room me pankha q on hai.

One hundred percent

Patient : What are the chances
of my recovering doctor?

Doctor : One hundred percent.
Medical records show that
nine out of ten people die of the disease you have.

Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died.

Sun of Moon

Teacher : Which is more important to us,
the sun or the moon?
Pupil : The moon.
Teacher : Why?
Pupil : The moon gives us light at night
when we need it but the sun gives us light
only in the day time when we dont need it.

Funny but truth

Y boys n girls dnt understand each othr?
God : coz i gave good brains 2 boys n good heart to girls,
bt boys use their heart n girls their brains..!!

A man on his death time

one kanjus on his death time
my wife where r u
wife= yes i'm here
kanjus-my sons r u all here
yess papa
to fir us room me pankha q on hai.

Funny T-shirt Quote

Best quote on a girl's T-shirt :
In front - "I M Virgin"
On back - "This is my old T-shirt"

Keep sending sms

Human=Eat+Work+sms+sleep
Gadha=Eat+Work+sleep

hence
Human=Gadha + sms
or
Human - Sms = Gadha
 proves that human without sending sms = Gadha

Little girl and shopkeeper

lil girl went 2 shop and asked
"jb m badi ho jaungi mujse sadi kroge?"
shopkeeper : "Ha kyun nahi"
lil girl : to apni hone wali wife ko 1 chocolate v nhi doge

Little kid and math

Letter by a little kid who hates math..
Dear math please grow up n solve ur own problems
dont depend on others

Funny jokes about lipstick and fevistick

Dad : beta, why ur sister sitting so silent?
Son : Nothing dad sister asked lipstick
but I gave fevistick thats all

Funny sms for your friends

1.Saa
2.Re
3.Gaa
4.Maa
5.Paa
6.Dha
7.Nee
8.Saa

Kripya khudko pehchan ne ke liye 3 our 6 fir se dohraye

Bina kapdo ke

Log aapne kapdo ke style p kitna paisa barbad karta hain,
jabki zindgi k sabse hasin lamhe bina kapdo k guzar jate hain

A funny sms about facebook addiction

Height of Addiction :
just b4 a prisoner's execution the officer
asked him abt his last wish
He told :
"Dude! I wanna update my facebook status"

A funny sms about cockroach

2 cockroach ICU mein ek dusre ke bagal me admit tha,
1st cockroach (sympathy k sath) bola

"kya baygon se?"
2nd : "nehi re, paragon se.."

Itni badi car kayse khayega

Sonu : kyu be, kaha ja raha hain?
Monu : yaar 'karkhane' ja raha hu..
Sonu : abe saale ullu banata hain..
itni badi Car tu kaise Khayega?

Height of "Ohh Shit"

Height of "Ohh Shit" like situation..
 

A guy takes a blade n write his girlfriend's name
on his forearm and?


makes a spelling mistake...

Women are like computers

Women are like computers.
As soon as u commit 2 one, u realize that,
if u had waited a little longer
u could have had a better model..

Wife and husband - funny sms

Wife:What is 10 years with me?
Husband:A second.
Wife:What is 1000 for me?
Husband:A coin.
Wife: Ok give me a coin.
Husband:Wait a second

A Funny inside doctor's clinic

Two children were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying very loudly.
2nd Child: Why are you crying?
1st Child: I came here for a blood test.
2nd Child: So? Are you afraid?
1st Child: No. For the blood test, they cut my finger.
 

At this, the second one started crying profusely.
The first one was astonished.
1st Child: Why are you crying now?

2nd Child: I came for a urine test !